This is it. This is Germany in the 1930s and what you do will be recorded in the history books. Your children and grandchildren will look back and ask what you did. Will you be able to look them in the face?
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👊Punch Nazis👊
I have really bad news for America’s newly-empowered Nazis in ICE: This will all end very badly for you.
I get it! You think you’re protected! Everything is going according to plan. You’re obeying the law! (You’re not, but we’ll get to that) You’re the good guy! And this is America, right? Cops never get in trouble no matter how fucking crazy they get. Just have to wave that badge in front of a jury and all is forgiven. “I was a’feared for muh safety!” are the magic words that allow law enforcement to beat unarmed suspects to a pulp. Allows them to murder people in handcuffs and get a pat on the back. Hell, do it enough times and you get a cool medal for multiple kills!
And, hey, look at this awesome bill the GOP is trying to pass! ICE is gonna be on fucking steroids, bro!
Who is the regime going to hire with that $8 billion? Sober, experienced law enforcement professionals? Men, and it will be 98% men, who take the rule of law seriously and plan to uphold their oath to the Constitution? Bish, please. We all know the screening for candidates will involve questions like, “Have you ever fucked your cousin?” and “Please describe the the intense love you have for pointy white hoods." and “Whose birthday do you masturbate the hardest on: Hitler, Putin, or General Lee?”
Stephen Miller and Tom Homan are not going to be looking for rational adults. They’ll be looking for rabid animals willing to hunt down anyone not deemed sufficiently white enough to be a “real” American. And after they’ve scooped up enough of Those People, they’ll move on to the “enemies of the state.” You know, journalists and activists and “socialists” and Democrats and protesters and anyone who doesn’t fall in line with the new order.
What? You think Miller’s planned concentration camps are gonna fucking fill themselves?!
#NurembergThemAll
Now, this is the important thing to understand, and I really need our good friends in ICE to grasp this concept: Your regime is going to fall. And then we’re going to come for you.
I know…I know. The Fourth Reich will never fall. The last set of Nazis said the same thing. A thousand years, they said. The Bush regime said it would rule for 100 years. Trump said he would be president for life back during his first term and then his little insurrection didn’t succeed. He made it the second time but do you really want to bet your life he’ll be in power until he dies in, what? 8? 9 years? Man’s not looking so good these days. You think his idiot sons are going to take over? Maybe Lara Trump? Maybe Stephen Miller will rise to power as the new Führer! Maybe JD Vance will lead a new techbro oligarchy!
I think we all know that when Trump shuffles off this mortal coil, it’s all over for the MAGA movement. And his brain will be Swiss cheese long before that happens. But unless Trump strokes out before 2028, the regime is going to fall then anyway. You can’t stop it, no matter how much you might think you can.
And then things are going to get really ugly for you, really fast.
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The only good Nazi is a ____ Nazi.
You may be betting that America will just “move on” like we have in the past. That we’ll concentrate on “looking forward, not back” like we did after Trump 1.0. And Bush. And the other Bush. And Reagan. And Nixon. And the decades of lynching and the KKK and the pro-Nazi movement in the 30s and the Civil War and and and. Literally a century and a half of traitors, fascists, slavers, and insurrectionists, almost all of them white men, all of them from the right. Always trying to destroy this country because you hate it and everything it stands for.
And we let you try again and again and again. Because we don’t punish racist white men in America.
Are you REALLY sure that history will hold? Because let me tell ya, buddy, we’re pretty fucking tired of you. We’ve been tired of you for a really long time and you’ve used up all of our tolerance and patience. That well done run dry. Now? Now we just want to put you up against a wall and put a bullet in your head.
Maybe you shouldn’t have come out of the Nazi closet. Maybe you shouldn’t have covered your faces and started grabbing people off the street like a secret police. We don’t have a secret police here. But you couldn’t wait to cosplay as the Gestapo, right? You had a throbbing erection for the unaccountable violence you’d get to visit on those filthy aliens you hate so much.
Maybe you should have stuck to the rule of law instead of wilding out. But you thought the good times would last forever and no one would ever come for you.
But we will.
Do you think Trump will pardon you? Do you think we’re going to give a fuck? We’re going to come for you and you’re either going to spend the rest of your life in a little box or you’re going to swing from the end of a rope. No one cares if you were just following orders. You had a choice but you were so eager to follow Stephen Miller’s Nazi vision for America you didn’t think about what would come after. There’s always an after. The regime always falls.
Sometimes, there are truth and reconciliation commissions. You should only BE so fucking lucky. We will not be having those. At least not at first. America is an extremely bloody-minded country and we do so like taking our revenge. We really REALLY don’t like Nazis and, boy howdy, are you fucks leaning into that swastika life.
When we find out what you’ve done in the camps you’ll be running? The rapes, the murders, the child trafficking? Because let’s be honest, you fucking pedophile freaks, you’re going to molest kids by the hundreds. We’re not going to want to reconcile with you. We’re going to want you dead. And you won’t be able to run fast enough, far enough to get away. How many of you think you can escape to Mother Russia? Think you’ll all be welcome there? Maybe. They need more cannon fodder for their war, after all.
Sure, a lot of you are hiding your faces. Not very well, though. Even so, you’re all on video. over and over again. You’re on video. Do you think we’re not going to be able to take your file and match it to your stupid Nazi face? I don’t give a fuck how much is covered. We’re going to know who you are and what you’ve done. And then you’re going to swing or rot in a cell.
Or maybe you’ll cooperate with the tribunals and you get to live. Oh? What? Did you think all of you would swear a blood oath to never betray your fellow rat fucks? BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! First of all, not all of you are actually Nazis. Some of your fellow agents will manage not to stain their souls with blood and evil. Those agents are going to be more than happy to give the rest of you up. And then there will be the traitors. There are always traitors willing to sell the rest of you out to save their own skin. Fascists are weak and cowardly and, ultimately, pathetic. It’s the core of who you are. If you were a real man, you wouldn’t be a fascist.
So, yeah, we’re going to find out who you are no matter how hard you try to hide your identity. And then you get the Nuremberg treatment. No pardon will save you. No one will mourn you. You’ll just be another piece of shit Nazi crushed by the United States. Your blood will water the tree of liberty, a lesson for the rest of your kind to stay hidden because you’re not getting another shot at this.
You fucked around and I promise you, you’re going to find out.
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